Good afternoon friends,
Being intentional is key to any relationship, especially marriage.
I had a friend come into town after she had moved away 20+ years ago. Even though we were great friends in the day, we both really neglected to stay in touch for what ever our reasons were at the time. We each had thought about each other but did not act. Time passed by so quickly with all the life altering things that we had missed.
All too easily, this type of thing happens with our spouse. It seems silly to say when we live in the same house, but without being intentional our spouses can become distant, feel like we have “grown apart” when in reality our priorities got out of order or we got lazy and neglected our relationship, for what ever the reason or excuse.
We often are very busy in our daily lives, jobs, kids, extra activities that under normal circumstances are fine and dandy. But when we lose track of the hours, days, years, our relationships suffer.
To think about loving our spouse is great, but it is the action that matters. They need to know they matter to us. They need us to pour into their “love tank”. Warning! If we don’t, someone else will and that is a whole other conversation for another time.
If you have never taken the “Love Language test” by Gary Chapman, I highly recommend it. The just of it is that we each feel loved or receive love differently, and it takes being intentional to help your spouse feel loved. This can be a tool for all your important relationships, for he has written a book on this topic for each relationship type.
What about your relationship with God, have you neglected Him? With God as our source He has an even higher priority. This relationship, will pour out onto all other relationships including and most importantly our marriage. We must be intentional to make time for and to invest time with God, seeking Him, in prayer, conversation, thoughts, reading the Word (the bible) etc.
“Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness…” (Matthew 6:33 NIV)
You may need to pull the weeds in your life. Some things may look pretty or are just plain opportunistic, having watered them they are overgrowing your life garden. Evaluate your priorities God, spouse, children, job and then extended family, ministry, etc. and limit or remove the things or relationships that are stealing your time and energy. It is important!
Take and make the time to be intentional and invest in God, for He will not leave or forsake you (see verse Deuteronomy 31:6, and Hebrews 13:5 in the bible no matter the version), and He has better for you than you could ever want for yourself ( read Jeremiah 29:11).
Invest time and energy and being intentional in your marriage, that it will last a life time.